Skip to main content

Application for Support Role

Currently accepting applications for the position of Support Role. You will be employed under a brilliant, talented individual with endless hopes and dreams. As a support role your duties will include supporting my financial, emotional, and physical needs. The qualifications include male, attractive, rich, and smart. The candidate must be proficient in life skills such as cooking, cleaning, and laundry. The Support Role must be willing to drop what they're doing at any moment to help me through struggles while multitasking a full-time work schedule elsewhere, to keep up community appearances of a higher society and to assure financial means. There must not be any discussion of finances. However, there must be available funds to support my hopes and dreams at all times.
The compensation and benefits package for this position include, occasional sexual favors, only if it does not interrupt the creative process, the pride in supporting a future success story, and not being alone.
If considered for this position, the next steps will be the interview process. You will be assigned to impress me with a nice dinner and a 500 question personality test. You will also be required to pass an extensive background check to make sure you're not a pedophile or have a criminal history.
If you meet these qualifications and are interested in this position, please submit your resume, a picture, a letter of intent, and your latest bank statement. A sense of entitlement over me as a Support Role will result in immediate firing, with up to six months of continued financial support.

Want to hear more from this blogger? Visit Jessica Ryan's Portfolio.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The sun will come out, tomorrow..

Why is it that a bad day can turn into a bad week, and then into a bad couple of months? Is this a chain reaction from a negativity-focused mindset, or is it really that bad? A positive is that after bad incidents occur, there is a lesson to be learned, which puts me one-step ahead of who I was last week. Seems like only last week that my dog locked herself inside my car while I was pumping gas. When you have to give up nice things, like your brand new Jeep that has a keyless start, you forget that your used Nissan Versa hatchback has only one key that is still locked in, staring devilishly from the ignition. This is how I discovered the advantages of AAA about one incident too late. Just when you think you have everything figured out, you’re watching $70 float away as some chump pulls up an hour later and unlocks your car in about 5 seconds. The piling effect just proves to be true, as your bank account had less than $10 until tomorrow to eat and your goal of a five buck Lil Creaser’...
Post a Comment
Read more

You're never too old for PB&J

No one warned me about a slowed metabolism until it was too late. Or maybe I wasn't listening, because I was a teenager. Teenagers don't listen. When you were in high school, it would be perfectly normal to finish off an entire pizza all to yourself while maintaining a skeletal figure. I try to reflect on that time to figure out the exact formula of my teenage diet, thinking I could revert back to it. All that comes to memory is binge eating the crappiest food possible or not eating at all. Which identically aligns with my current eating habits. However, I am withholding this "woman's" body. In reviewing my physical activity as a teenager, I do recall a lot more exercise. I was involved in organized sports everyday after school. I ran around the neighborhood on my bike or roller blades with my friends. I did a lot of spontaneous dancing in my room in front of the mirror. And even though I was a brat who did not participate in gym class, I have come to realize...
Post a Comment
Read more

It's Fate!

The last time I had ever heard mentioning of the phrase "life-crisis" is when my step-dad raced his Suzuki 1000 crotch rocket around town every night and fucked around on my mom. Being a teenager it seemed, by definition, a time when a man becomes tired of his wife and kids so he buys stupid things and does stupid stuff. For example, he has been married for a long time, he has teenage kids that are full of rebellion and rage, and a wife that wants absolutely nothing to do with him, because her kids are the main focus at that time. Add a nice expensive toy, a scandalous hot blonde, and a bloating confidence stemming from the sad realization he's done with his twenties, and well into his thirties and you have what is called a "mid-life crisis". During this "mid-life crisis", it seems people go into a deep and depressing denial that fuels the ridiculous behaviors and decisions they take on when they realize life has caught up with them, and they are not...
Post a Comment
Read more