Overcoming my Quarter-Life Crisis

Why is it that a bad day can turn into a bad week, and then into a bad couple of months? Is this a chain reaction from a negativity-focused mindset, or is it really that bad? A positive is that after bad incidents occur, there is a lesson to be learned, which puts me one-step ahead of who I was last week. Seems like only last week that my dog locked herself inside my car while I was pumping gas. When you have to give up nice things, like your brand new Jeep that has a keyless start, you forget that your used Nissan Versa hatchback has only one key that is still locked in, staring devilishly from the ignition. This is how I discovered the advantages of AAA about one incident too late. Just when you think you have everything figured out, you’re watching $70 float away as some chump pulls up an hour later and unlocks your car in about 5 seconds. The piling effect just proves to be true, as your bank account had less than $10 until tomorrow to eat and your goal of a five buck Lil Creaser’

The transition to “adulting” is like this: imagine yourself as a cute baby bird, chirping with joy. You have love, shelter and a belly full of worms. Until, all of the sudden, the nest starts to tilt. You are gripping your claws tightly into the side, trying to hold on as long as you possibly can before nature forcefully shoves you from mommy’s cozy nest. You are out in the open air, alone. Quickly plummeting towards the hard ground of grown-up responsibilities. Flapping your weak and inexperienced wings in hopes that they will fly gracefully among the path of society’s acceptance train. If you did not manage to splatter against the pavement or break your neck on a tree branch on the way down, congrats! You’ve made it! What is the reward you ask? To spend the rest of your life flying around in hopes you don’t come crashing down.   Why is the real world so cruel? It could care less about the amount of sleep endured, a human’s mental state as a result of working day after day, or th

No one warned me about a slowed metabolism until it was too late. Or maybe I wasn't listening, because I was a teenager. Teenagers don't listen. When you were in high school, it would be perfectly normal to finish off an entire pizza all to yourself while maintaining a skeletal figure. I try to reflect on that time to figure out the exact formula of my teenage diet, thinking I could revert back to it. All that comes to memory is binge eating the crappiest food possible or not eating at all. Which identically aligns with my current eating habits. However, I am withholding this "woman's" body. In reviewing my physical activity as a teenager, I do recall a lot more exercise. I was involved in organized sports everyday after school. I ran around the neighborhood on my bike or roller blades with my friends. I did a lot of spontaneous dancing in my room in front of the mirror. And even though I was a brat who did not participate in gym class, I have come to realize

During this amazing transition time between immaturity and adulthood, you can still get away with doing certain things before it's too late. One of those things is being able to go out to bars and clubs without being looked down on, but it's important that you learn how to do it the right way. In the past it was a much more acceptable action. You would spend hours getting dressed up, pre-gaming all night, and then sloppily heading to the bar where you end up spending all of your money for the week. You may have experienced on a regular basis, talking to random people all night with no filter, falling on the dance floor, and/or puking on the sidewalk as you stumble out of the bar. It's time to put your big-girl pants on and learn how to do it the right way, because you only have this little window where it's still acceptable for you to go and do things that are fun. Doing things you don't want to, because you have to, is the definition of "adulting". Befor

The last time I had ever heard mentioning of the phrase "life-crisis" is when my step-dad raced his Suzuki 1000 crotch rocket around town every night and fucked around on my mom. Being a teenager it seemed, by definition, a time when a man becomes tired of his wife and kids so he buys stupid things and does stupid stuff. For example, he has been married for a long time, he has teenage kids that are full of rebellion and rage, and a wife that wants absolutely nothing to do with him, because her kids are the main focus at that time. Add a nice expensive toy, a scandalous hot blonde, and a bloating confidence stemming from the sad realization he's done with his twenties, and well into his thirties and you have what is called a "mid-life crisis". During this "mid-life crisis", it seems people go into a deep and depressing denial that fuels the ridiculous behaviors and decisions they take on when they realize life has caught up with them, and they are not

You sigh from relief when you wake in your bed. Can you imagine if last night's dream really happened? Our dreams are a direct look into our subconscious minds. A farce twist on your normal day-to-day, such as going to school, hanging out with friends or family, or being at work. One minute everything is normal, the next minute you are stuck in a worst-case scenario situation. You feel guilt, sadness, shame, and fear. You become fully immersed, because the dream feels so real, at first. Suddenly, the people and places that you recognize, slowly appear strange and outlandish. Now you start to ask yourself, "Am I dreaming?". Noticing these subtle differences between reality and what must be a dream can give you the rare opportunity of lucid dreaming. Lucid dreaming is one of the most amazing skills to posses, although it is completely useless to society, and entirely selfish. I see it as a guilty pleasure. A night filled with entertainment, an escape from reality. You